I really enjoy Inductions… but only when other people are having them. I feel shy being the center of attention. This is my second Induction in 14 years. I went out of my way 2 years ago to miss another one, ending up in Ukraine at the beginning of the war. And I hope this is my last one too.
As I am planning to make EHRS my home I think it is a good opportunity for me to tell you a bit more about myself.
As most of you now know I come from Minsk, the capital of Belarus. I am a very proud Brit now but on top of my accent here and there my Belarusian mentality lets me down. I told my colleagues that they should treat me as a person on a Belarusian-mentality-spectrum. I am the kind of person who, when asked, what I think about something, says exactly what I think about that something.
Now, after 19 years in the UK, I’ve established a few coping mechanisms for myself and my English-speaking family. When one of them asks me what I think about something, I sometimes ask before replying back: would you like me to be honest or kind?
I think I’ve become a more agreeable person since I came across a useful book by Robert Hutton [1] where I learnt some insights into the use of the English language. For example, Mr. Hutton explained to me that:
“Cautiously optimistic” means “I think it’ll either be fine, in which case I want you to thank me, or it won’t, in which case I don’t want you to blame me”;
“I can’t promise that” is “There is no way in hell I’m ever going to do that”;
“I am sorry, but..” stands for “I am not sorry at all”;
“Let’s be honest” is “let’s agree with me”;
“Let’s face it” is “Let’s agree that you’re wrong”;
“With respect” is “Please [go away]*”;
“With the greatest respect” is [go away] twice[1].
So you are getting the best out of me today but can you imagine what my Nottingham community had to put up with for years? Despite some obvious challenges with me, my community in Nottingham became a family. I am so happy that many of my friends from Nottingham are here with me today.
I have worked very hard to build bridges between people, cultures and faiths. I strongly believe in cooperation.
It was a good reminder for me that Jew haters don’t distinguish between the Jews. No one said “Reform Jews” step forward, you can go home. The rest are staying with us as hostages. Orthodox or reform, secular or religious, grumpy or happy Jews – all were taken. So, shouldn’t this be a wake-up call both for Israel and the Diaspora about working together and not against each other.
I was bullied in my childhood for being Jewish and as a result of it grew up with a negative sense of Jewish identity. I only stopped having a recurring nightmare about Nazis running after me when I moved to the UK. 14 years ago I felt safer here. So it is painful and disappointing for me to see the rise of antisemitism in the UK.
At times like this I feel like a little girl again, standing in the middle of the room, lost and fearful, waiting to be bullied. But…I am not that little girl, standing out there helpless and hopeless, anymore. I refuse to succumb to fear and despair. As long as I live, I will work for peace and stand up to racism.
And as your Rabbi, I can assure you that together with you and my colleagues we will work tirelessly to support Israel and towards the peace process for both Israelis and Palestinians. I choose to believe that there are many good people in this world who share our moral and ethical values and who want their children to live in peace and have happy and healthy lives. We will work together with them and the first step was starting our interfaith group just after the High Holidays.
I mentioned my colleagues. The miracle for me is not to confirm to you that they are indeed two very talented, creative, caring and charismatic leaders, who I have learned from a lot. The miracle for me is to be as fond of them now after closely working with them for a year, as I was of them both when I just started 12 months ago. Thank you for all your support and also allowing me to be myself and different. The three of us are looking forward to welcoming Cantor Tamara Wolfson into our team from January. Four musketeers, fab four or just unstoppable? I will leave it to you to find the best name for our magnificent team!
I really enjoyed getting to know our dedicated and hard-working professional team. I know how much you contribute to our community’s reputation of being an inclusive and welcoming place.
And our amazing volunteers, Honorary Officers and members of different committees and groups. You are an inspiration and another major reason why I wanted to stay here. Your welcome, kindness and support melted my heart.
The cherry on the top of the cake for me were two ladies, one of whom is here today, telling me “You are too young and too good-looking to be a Rabbi.” After that I thought I am definitely staying.
My wonderful parents are watching us online today. It is quite upsetting for me that now I have to go to Georgia to meet with my family these days and that my parents are not here with us today.
So, it is even more special for me to have my Jewish and non-Jewish friends from Nottingham, Elstree Liberal Synagogue, London, Switzerland and Russia here today. The world is a strange place at the moment but your presence, my friends, my colleague-friends, members of our community who are here today in person and watching us online, your presence fills me with warmth and hope for the future.
Friendship and care can cure loneliness and fear. Friendship has no nationality, colour or boarder. Hatred won’t heal the world but kindness and friendship can.
So as we were reading the story of Hagar and Ishmael from the Torah this morning I would like to finish with dedicating the following poem by Shin Shalom written in Hebrew in 1968 to peace, friendship and my Muslim friends who are here today in person and online:
Ishmael, my brother,
How long shall we fight each other?
My brother from times bygone,
My brother – Hagar’s son,
My brother, the wondering one.
One angel was sent to us both,
One angel watched over our growth –
There in the wilderness, death threatening through thirst,
I a sacrifice on the altar, Sarah’s first.
Ishmael, my brother, hear my plea:
It was the angel who tied three to me…
Time is running out, put hatred to sleep,
Shoulder to shoulder, let’s water our sheep.
[1] Robert Hutton, “Would they lie to you”, by Elliott&Thomson, 2014.
*I edited the author’s text replacing the word “die” with ” go away”
