No more excuses
Taylor Lewis bar-mitzvah
Parashat Nishavim is about excuses. We are told off for making them or even thinking about making them.
But are excuses so bad for us? Is it even possible to live our lives without having a few excuses to hand?
In my career as a Rabbi the best excuse came from a bar-mitzvah student in Nottingham, who said he couldn’t make it to our lesson because he’d eaten too much of his grandma’s delicious chicken soup and had become sick. If he’d said: fish balls, or schnitzel or kugel or lokshen pudding, I might have believed him, but chicken soup, Jewish penicillin made by his grandma’s loving hands?! “Na”, I said to myself and turned to my colleague, Rabbi Google to check the Nottingham Forest fixtures. I replied to the boy, saying: if your grandma’s middle name is Nottingham Forest, then I completely understand how you feel today.
Most of us have probably had a situation in our life when we needed an excuse to get out of a dinner party or an outing with friends or work colleagues for various reasons. Let’s call these kind of excuses “social excuses”. We come up with different reasons when we don’t want to do something but can’t be honest about it.
We can’t judge if these excuses are good or bad for us and society. It’s up to us to figure that out when we’re in those situations.
Then there are the “get me out of here” excuses, often used by politicians. They rarely take responsibility and often blame someone else when thing go wrong. Sometimes, this blame is justified because many people can contribute to big mistakes becoming disasters.
For example, closing down hundreds of schools due to safety concerns. Whose fault is it?
The Prime-Minister (or the Chancellor of the Exchequer as he was at the time) says not his, even though he and his team cut the schools repair budget.
Can we blame the current Educational Minister? I don’t think we can even ask her this question as she is an emotional person and might use words that are covered by TV channels with a beep.
We can’t even ask those smart heads who decided to use RAAC [reinforced autoclaved aerated concrete][1] as a cheaper alternative to standard concrete in 1950s or those smart heads who already knew about the danger of the collapse of this cheaper alternative but continued to use it building schools until the 1990s. Tell me, how can we prevent these kind of crises or even more horrific tragedies like in the case of Lucy Letby, from happening again?
And looking at the global level modern Genocides are tragic examples of how excuses, denial and inaction can lead to catastrophic consequences.
For example, the Rwandan Genocide shocked the international community in 1994 but its failure to intervene and the excuses made by various parties within and outside Rwanda led to the murder of an estimated 600 000 to 800 000 people. This reminds us of the importance of taking responsibility and actively working to prevent and respond to such crises in the future.
However, there is a third category of excuses, which I call “personal”. We all make them and sometimes on a daily basis.
“I will start my diet on Monday…but cannot decide which Monday!”
“I cannot give up sugar and chocolate as it is one of our five a day because it is made of cocoa and cocoa grows on trees so eating chocolate is like eating salad!”
Excuses hold us back from pursuing our dreams, learning new skills, having trustworthy relationships with people in our lives and becoming better versions of ourselves. Paraphrasing photographer Gina Milicia most of us can probably agree that the comfort zone is indeed cosy but nothing ever grows there.
These kind of excuses the Parashat Nitzavim addresses and warns us against both as individuals and people. It starts with a covenant and two singularly important word “you stand” – אתם נצבים: every single Israelite is taking part in the ceremony establishing the covenant with God. And not just that, verse 14 specifies that the Covenant was made not only with the people who were present there but also with the people who weren’t, meaning you and me as well[2].
The Covenant with God is a legal agreement, when we promise to follow the rule and teachings of the Torah, meaning living a moral and ethical life in exchange for all the blessings and protection this high standard of conduct can secure us.
Life isn’t easy and we will find lots of excuses not to do the right thing. But this time, the Torah talks to all of us, not just one person. It reminds us that we are all responsible for each other, and one person’s excuses can hurt the whole community.
Claude Montefiore, a member of the first Reform Synagogue in the UK, and a co-founder of Liberal Judaism, said “We Jews have a more pressing responsibility for our lives and beliefs than perhaps any other religious community.
Don’t shelter yourself in any course of action by the idea that “it is not my affair”. It is your affair, but it is also mine and the community’s. Nor can we neglect the world beyond…Ethically or religiously, we Jews can be and do nothing light-heartedly. Ten bad Jews may help to damn us, ten good Jews may help to save us. Which minyan will you join?”
On this last Shabbat before Rosh ha-Shanah, before the beginning of the new year, let’s make a promise to break free from the chains of unnecessary excuses, which limit us on the road towards our dreams and achievements. As Shimon Perez, ז״ל, said: “you are as great as the cause you serve and as young as your dreams.” Let’s start dreaming and make ourselves and our community great, and, as the Torah reminds us: no excuses!
[1] BBC News, September 7th, 2023
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-essex-66727834
[2] Deuteronomy 29:14
